Am I Sad or Depressed? What's the Difference?
By Peggy Loo, PhD
As a psychologist, I am often asked what’s the difference between sadness and depression. It’s a great question. Understanding the difference helps you recognize what may be going on for you and come up with a plan. Few things are less disempowering than feeling confused, lost, or not having words for your own personal experience. With Daylight Savings around the corner ushering in shorter days and longer nights, understanding unique mood challenges during this season can also help us meet them better prepared. So let’s dive in.
Feeling sad? Clarifying what sadness feels like
Sadness is often momentary (even if it’s a long moment), linked to a specific matter, and often lessens with time or healthy coping. While feeling sad may disrupt your day and require some adjustments, these tend to be relatively minor and most people can often go on and focus adequately on their work responsibilities or personal routines. Generally speaking, feeling sad does not eliminate the ability to experience hope, motivation, connection with others, or feel other emotions (like enjoyment or frustration) when a situation warrants them. It is important to know that sadness is a healthy and helpful emotion, even if it is difficult to feel. Allowing and expressing sadness gives us a way to legitimize and frame specific experiences of loss - from losing a familiar social life to losing a job or anticipated opportunity.
Common symptoms of depression
Depression includes a sad mood, but it is not simply a “stronger version” of sadness. While we may interchangeably use the words “sad” with “depressed” in everyday speech, the experiences are not identical. [You may hear mental health professionals use terms like “depressive disorders” or “major depressive disorder” among others - what you need to know is that vocabulary specifies how and how long these symptoms have impacted your life so we can clarify how to best help.] Depression is often described as more pervasive and all-encompassing, like a weighted blanket over the majority of your day, near daily. It can coincide with broader feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, or guilt. While a specific incident may activate depression-like symptoms, depression often endures despite changes in your situation and may surprise you in the midst of positive circumstances. The effects of depression are more significantly disruptive - to the point of interfering with work, relationships, and basic aspects of daily life. For example, the consistent inability to focus, make decisions, or maintain regular sleep and eating patterns despite effort can be clues to look out for. Whereas it is still possible to enjoy things or people when you are sad about something, people with depression repeatedly do not experience pleasure or motivation in areas they used to and are more likely to socially withdraw. Some report an experience of ongoing fatigue and a literal deceleration of thoughts and physical movement.
Seasonal Affective Disorder or winter blues
Anecdotally, most people I know share that they are emotionally affected by the change in daylight during the fall and winter seasons. (Interestingly, research is mixed - it is not a given that less daylight means you need to prepare for sad feelings or a depressive episode!) Seasonal Affective Disorder, or now known as “Major Depressive Disorder with Seasonal Pattern” is a mouthful of syllables that describes a significant disruption to your mood that fluctuates specifically (and only!) with changes in seasons. This means how you feel is directly tied to the calendar year, including when your mood changes begin and end. For example, most individuals experience depressive symptoms starting in the fall and winter consistently report relief from those symptoms right when spring and summer roll around. This pattern is also regularly demonstrated year after year (therefore it requires observing this effect for at minimum two years).
Each of these experiences can be painful, lonely, and difficult to manage - but it is important to remember that there are ways to successfully cope with all three. Consider reaching out for professional support whether you’re feeling sad, depressed, or suspect that your mood is related to the season. If you are considering thoughts of death or suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-8255 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. You do not need to face what you’re feeling alone and there is help.
10 Practical tips to boost your mood
I think self-care is an excellent idea in theory, but in practice it can be boring, unrealistic, and hard to follow through with. What works for one person may cause eye-rolling for another. Effective self-care requires self-awareness. I am still learning what works for me, and how to make it attuned and practical according to where I am in life. Here are some ideas.
Prioritize your eating and sleeping.
Everything mood-related is worsened when you’re hungry, eating poorly, or not sleeping adequately. Start by changing or adding one thing to improve your eating or sleeping.
Add some physical activity (at a point in your day where you already have a routine).
Everything mood-related is always better with exercise because it can readily shift your physical and emotional state.
Plan something to look forward to every day.
Make it small. This is built-in optimism and reminds you that you have the power to influence your emotions and your mood.
Do things with others.
Texting, video chats, shared movie viewing, getting together for a walk, coffee or drink - does not matter. It can be easy to spend too much time alone, uninterrupted. Share what you’re up to. Be a part of what others are up to.
Get out of the apartment.
Even if that’s just down the block. Often sadness or depression means a lot of time in our heads, being sedentary, and a sense of disconnection from the world around us.
Learn what soothes you.
Experiment with your senses: weighted or fleece blankets, greenery, music, physical touch, a leisurely cup of coffee.
Get what daylight you can.
Works for plants and people. Rearrange your furniture towards windows. Try a sunrise alarm clock. (Does not work on plants)
Try therapy, plan for more sessions, or talk to your therapist about it.
Plan for short-term therapy during the winter months or ask about light therapy. Request a second session if you are struggling or mention to your therapist any noticeable changes in mood even if that’s not what you’ve been working on.
Consider medication.
It’s understandable if you have mixed feelings about medication. Start with an appointment with a psychiatrist - it does not mean you have to take medication now or forever. Come prepared with your questions or concerns. Sometimes feeling a little better first creates helpful momentum for you to engage in other activities that support your mood.
Consider out of the box reasons for your mood.
If you’re unsure if changes in your mood may be medically-related, (e.g., endocrinological, gynecological, vitamin/iron deficiency) make an appointment with a medical provider or specialist, especially if you haven’t been in a while. Make a list of your symptoms to share and ask if there are test that can help you identify what’s going on (e.g., blood work).
About the Therapist: Dr. Peggy Loo is an autumn-lover and thinks 55-60 degrees is the perfect temperature. Her self-care has been (re)watching comedy specials on Netflix, trying to find perfectly shaped maple leaves, weekend trips to the dog park, and Thai Tea mini-mochis from Trader Joe’s.